opposites don't attract

What happens when you realize someone is deliberately saying the opposite of everything you say?

Well. Is it a sign of insanity?

Talked to M about getting involved with a person, and M seemed very aloof about it. M stated M wouldn't get involved, because they were traditional or more conservative.

Which of course, made me laugh. Because I've recalled instances where M had taken off with someone they just met that night and went home with them, as me as a witness. And I gently pointed out that they had on more than one occasion been less than conservative and had done some spur of the moment things when lust had grabbed them. They paused for a second to consider it, then admitted that they had. Like I needed them to admit that. I stated they could not be old fashioned if they had been a lot more impulsive than that.

"You reacted on your impulsiveness, not ignored it," I stated, and that was the end of that.

Was this person trying to re-write history yet again? It seemed at times that this person was used to re-writing their history as they saw fit -- usually the person that knew them ended up not knowing them anymore and they were no longer friends.

So there was no one to refute or deny any revision to M's life story. M could tell it any way they wished, and who was going to know?

Except as time passed, I was knowing a certain history, and as far as the instances of sexuality and attractiveness, I had been a casual observer. And the re-writes weren't going to happen with me.

M was someone who liked having relationships, light and uncomplicated, that wouldn't impinge on M's freedom to do as M pleased. Of course this meant that the person had to be special, someone who would be able to walk that fine line with M.

Depending on M's mood, that line could change.

There was a distancing with M. You weren't allowed to get too close. So if you don't mind being held at a distance, then M is your ticket to that aloof romance. Where things are pristine and don't get dirty or twisted, but don't get too close either. You can think whatever you want of M but it will be pure and unfettered, no strings attached.

Ask nothing of M that M can't handle. Too many rules may make M squirm and run. Treat M too lightly and M might just float away into another's arms. M likes attention and likes to be the one to walk away.

So sitting at a bar where M is acting amused while I get some attention was a little refreshing. Until the point was brought up about how M was so conservative and not into what these alcohol fueled dolts were proposing. "I just don't go off with anybody," M said all prim. I smiled, and immediately the thought came to mind of how M had indeed taken off with someone they barely knew after a dance or two on the dancefloor.

"Um, yes you have. I can recall quite a few times where you acted on impulse, my dear." I said, with a smile. Realizing I was incredulous at M's blatant lie. Or was it hypocrisy? Or just getting old that M simply forgot their sexual appetite?

"Ohhhhh...well. Yes." M's smile twitched. I watched as M's face changed from at first seemingly unaware of what they'd just said to the realization that yes, they had gotten some because I witnessed them in action.

"Hmmmm. Thought so." I thought.

When M saw me getting attention and enjoying it, it seemed to turn M off. Suddenly M was forgetting what they used to do and how I was not privvy to that kind of thing. Back then, I didn't mess around, I was looking for something more serious.

Yet here we were, several years later, and was M informing me the tables had turned? Can one go back to being a virgin? No, I don't think so.

I looked at M and realized that there was a creature who did this kind of thing. Who changed to reflect the situation they were in. Yet a part of me also sensed that this was deliberate, to be deliberately the opposite, that one of us had to be the practical one while the other was having fun and going dizzy. What would happen if we were ever on the same page. Suddenly I understood M, I had gotten to where M had gotten, and now M was putting on the brakes by taking the other side of where I had been.

I kept thinking that M was the other part of me. I can imagine this.

So if I'm being the opposite, that keeps me safe. That keeps me....distant.