Excuses to get out of boredom

Sitting at home, there's no money. Can't find work, sporadic at best with freelancing. Part-time work or temp work simply does not provide a sustainable living wage to make an investment of one's time and energy in. I do the best I can and keep looking, staying as positive and upbeat as possible. Meanwhile, there's no going out, no hanging out. So K is bored. Has been in pain the past several weeks, back pain and the like, and yet is bored. Despite the boredom, has attended several Broadway shows and plays.

I'm not sure what to think. A part of me has dulled the anger and another part knows that I am basically with my hands tied. I did this, I brought this on myself. I only have myself to blame. There are few options at the moment, and I tell myself that things will get better, things will change and move up. I keep hoping. And looking. And looking some more.

So the phone rings at 3:00 in the morning and K tells me it's family calling. At that time of night? Who else calls but either a hospital/jail/end of world scenario or a booty call? I don't have access to K's phone and would hate myself to snoop and check. I don't want it done to me so I don't want to do that to anyone, including K.

But as K has pointed out to me, sometimes in spite and sometimes just being matter of fact, my circle of friends has gotten thin to the point of non-existent. So the opportunity to meet up or cheat is minimal at best. There's nothing for K to worry about. Although K says that it would be a relief for me to get out and mingle, because I "have a chance" to find somebody unlike K who is very social and tends to make friends easily.

K kept asking about a friend of mine who had come to town, who met up with K at a show that K had access to discount tickets to so I asked K to accommodate. After the show, K kept dropping about how my friend had asked K to join her on Facebook. I just smiled and didn't respond, just said "mmm" that's about it. K said, well, I know how you feel about people bogarting your friends, because your other friend used to do that to you, so I won't friend her". So big of K. I still said nothing.

After the fourth time of K bringing up the Facebook thing, I finally opened my mouth. "This Facebook thing with my friend, why do you keep bringing it up?" I asked calmly. "What? I haven't brought it up, just this time." K answered. "Nope. This is actually the fourth time you've brought it up in the past two weeks since she left town. What are you hoping I'll say?"

"Well, I'm not going to be friends with them, because I know how you didn't like it when your other friend used to bogart your friends." "Am I supposed to say thank you or please or something? I don't understand why you bring this up four times if you 'already know' about the situation." I explained, "So, tell me, what was this really about?"

"Nothing - God!" was the exasperated reply. Really? Four times in two weeks? If you know the answer, I thought, then why even broach the topic, let alone more than once?

Because the bottom line is, K wanted an answer. K wanted a pat on the back, a kudos for 'being respectful of boundaries'. Instead, K also brought the point home my lack of social skills that K was blessed with having in abundance.

I didn't know if I should get pissed for the doubletalk or just let it go.